I Know Your Body Doesn't Belong To Me

And guess what? Mine doesn't belong to you either.

Now first and foremost, since I'm gay, I honestly don't give a shit about women's bodies or what they do with them. I never have (well, unless they were self-harming then yeah I would try to help them stop doing that). But what I want to address is this notion that men feel entitled to women's bodies. With all the social media posts, online articles, and YouTube rants on this topic, I could honestly wallpaper an entire 10,000-square foot home with what's been said, but this is the basic narrative/argument: men don't value women's bodies and their autonomy, the patriarchy constantly objectifies women and ingrains the idea that they only exist for male pleasure/satisfaction (aka the "male gaze"), women are in constant fear for their safety because men might attack them (or, heaven forbid, be catcalled, whistled, or hollered at), and that instead of telling criminals not to be criminals, society unfairly tells women to use self-defensive methods in order to thwart potential predators. This narrative is everywhere, the whole "I don't do this for you/I don't belong to you" trope has been repeated so many times it has become pervasive among social media and discussion topics related to gender. So, as a living and breathing man, this is my response to the authors of these diatribes.

Honeys, I have news for you. Men have shit to do, and your body is not on the list. Men have houses to build, roads to tear up and rebuild, cars to fix, crops to grow, windows to wash, trash to collect, oils rigs to attend to, ditches to dig, sewers to work, papers to push, numbers to crunch, businesses to run, trucks to drive, mail to deliver, students to teach, technology to create and perfect, medicine to create and perfect, sermons to preach, fires to put out, sports to play, and music to perform and compose, wars to fight, and people to save. They have wives, girlfriends, daughters, sisters, aunts, mothers, grandmothers, female cousins, and female friends that they love and support. We fucking know that your bodies don't belong to us, and quite frankly, we don't want them as much as you think we do. You continually cherry pick the (relative) few bad apples in the bunch in order to push this fallacy that men think they're entitled to women, when the reality is that the majority of men value your autonomy and do just fine without your body. The individuals who are harassing others on the street are the ones with the problem: not society, and not men. And while you are blithely unaware of the fact that men are more likely to be killed, assaulted, and receive threats of violence online and in real life, you constantly bring up trivial concerns like whistling, locker room banter, and unwanted comments/attention on the street in order to prove that there's a "war on women". Well, I'm not buying it, and I'm not feeding into it anymore. Not because of my toxic masculinity, but because the facts don't support your narrative.

You want to talk bodies and entitlement? Let's start with the men who have been slaughtered in war in order for you to maintain your civil liberties and the right to demonize an entire gender based on the actions of individuals who don't represent that whole. Not to mention that a good portion of those men didn't even want to fight in those wars, but were required to do so because men in this country are automatically required to sign up for the selective service when they turn 18. If they don't sign up, they face fines and/or jail time, they can't drive, they can't work, they can't vote, and they can't receive federal aid. From the moment men are born, they get their genitals mutilated without their consent, and from the moment they turn 18, their bodies belong to the state. We do not value a man's body and autonomy because whenever men are abused, raped, or sexually harassed, no one takes it seriously (all men really want is sex, right? men can just fight off an abusive partner, right? men can just walk away from traumatic situations without emotional scars, right?). And if you want to keep screeching that women's bodies don't belong to men, well neither do their bodies or their labor. Men built the house you live in, the building you work in, the cellphone you use, the computer you use, the medicine you use, the internet you use, and the beds you sleep on. You have benefited from men's sacrifices and labor your entire life, so much so that it's expected, and their innumerable contributions to society are largely ignored in order to push the idea that men are the sole threat to women's safety. You willfully (and often times maliciously) stand on their back and eat the fruits of their labor just so you can whine about how awful they are. You repeatedly claim that only women understand the perils of sexual harassment and violence, that only women can have a valid opinion on anything gender related. You expect to have respect from everyone you meet and have the sole voice in gendered issues just because you have a vagina. That's entitlement.

Now to destroy the illusion that because I'm a man, I've never had to experience harassment or being objectified. I was the victim of sexual harassment for years in grade school. Yes it was humiliating. Yes I felt horrible about it. Yes I had to deal with the emotional strain of being talked to and acted upon in that manner. I know what it feels like, but guess what? No matter how many times I told my principals and teachers, no one ever did a damn thing about it. I would come home in tears to my parents begging them to home-school me so I wouldn't have to deal with my peers. I didn't have an article published in widely distributed newspapers or online media about how my body doesn't belong to anyone else. I didn't have a voice, and I never received an apology for it (or any of the numerous shitty things people have done to me for the past sixteen years). I don't blame society or an entire gender for what happened to me: I blame the individuals who touched me, shoved their asses in my face, flashed me, taunted me, and preyed on my vulnerability. I don't project my insecurities onto others because I realized that I couldn't be a victim forever. Eventually I had to swallow the harsh reality that no one, male or female, is safe out here.

Get off your pedestal and come back to Earth. Men are completely disposable while women have affirmative action laws, domestic abuse shelters, rape crisis centers, and women's resource centers. Women's issues are at the forefront of our society while men are being left behind for the interest of "gender equality". And while you may think you speak for all women, the harshest truth is that an increasing number of women are done with you infantilizing them and portraying them as helpless victims who are unable of fending for themselves without government intervention. More and more women are distancing themselves from you (and feminism in general) because you do not speak for them, their experiences, or their views and attitudes towards men and sexual harassment. These women are grown adults who don't feel the need to whine about every single instance of them being catcalled, or whistled at, or stared at, or just talked to on the street. I agree with these women, and the male population when I say that your ramblings are demeaning to women and insulting to men. No, men do not feel entitled to your bodies. No, we are not constantly thinking of ways to put you down, objectify you, or harass you. We are all trying to get by here, you are not special.

No Men Required: How Women Led Me To Men's Issues

Now, as many people know, I was once drowned in the liberal kool-aid. I believed in the wage gap, the patriarchy, male privilege, rape culture, and all of those things commonly taught at university. I even called myself a feminist, and was extremely apathetic towards men's issues (because, let's face it, the indoctrination at college doesn't include talking about problems that men face in society). Fast-forward to now: I know the wage gap isn't real, I don't believe in rape culture, I don't think there's a super societal structure keeping women down, and I actually care about men's rights. I no longer call myself a feminist (I prefer egalitarian), and I'm no longer liberal (granted I'm still left-of-center, but only by a slight margin).

What. The hell. Happened?

Did I let my male fragility get the best of me? Did my male privilege blind me to the hell-hole for human rights that is the United States? Did the patriarchy come to my door and brainwash me? No, no, and definitely no. I am totally serious when I say that absolutely no men were required in these socio-political changes. My bros didn't encourage me to start 'raping bitches' left and right, my wages weren't raised just because I was a man, I wasn't living the high life because the patriarchy ensured that my needs were highest on their priority list. Indeed, those responsible for the shift in my beliefs were women. Liberal women, conservative women, libertarian women, moderate women, black women, white women, women who were feminists, women who weren't feminists, women who were men's rights activists, and everywhere else in between. Now, I eventually was introduced to male figures (Armoured Skeptic, Steven Crowder, Gavin McInnes, Dave Rubin, etc) but this was after my point-of-view completely changed from where it was before. So I feel that it's important to highlight the women who put me on a path towards discovering men's issues and why men's rights are still important in 2017.

Shoe0nHead (https://www.youtube.com/user/Shoe0nHead)
The woman, the myth, the legend, the YouTube personality that started it all. My first encounter with her was a video she made about how there are only 2 genders (don't worry I'm not going into my reaction I just wanted to give you the jump-off point). So I watched more of her stuff and came across her video named "Feminism is about equality". In it, she made so many great points that I will recap here: feminists are so condescending to women who don't identify as feminist, the vast majority of men and women in the US don't identify as feminist (most believe in equality though), there are indeed many feminists who hate men, men get screwed over in divorce/child custody cases and get their genitals mutilated without consent--but somehow this isn't seen as systematic oppression even though it very clearly is--and just because your movement's intentions are good doesn't mean you're automatically absolved from any moral responsibility. Other highlights include "Internalized misogyny", "The pink tax", "Questions for men answered by woman", and "Domestic violence against men". Now back to the gender thing, in that same video Shoe also introduced me to a bigger influence on my transition towards men's issues.

Blaire White (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCDmCBKaKOtOrEqgsL4-3C8Q)
Blaire White is a trans-woman who operates an anti-feminist, anti-SJW YouTube channel, where she discusses men's issues and other social topics such as Black Lives Matter. She is a funny woman who has so many good videos it's hard to say which is the best. But in falling down her rabbit hole there were some very strong highlights: "Feminism simplified", "There is no rape culture...stop", "MTV Hates men (unless they're trans)", "Feminists don't hate men?", "Tumblr vomit", and "Triggered to death by Milo Yiannopoulos". Now in addition to Blaire's very strong arguments about why being a man isn't an easy ride, she brought up important facts like men are the most likely victims of every single violent crime and that they're more likely to commit suicide. She also stressed the very important fact that there are male and female brains, and that societal conditioning really has little effect on our natural behaviors since so much of our behavior is governed by our biological make-up. That became an important thread through the rest of my research into women against feminism.

Christina Hoff Sommers (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3TR_YuDFIFI)
Otherwise known as Based Mom, CHS is a feminist, but one that not only supports men, but has brought to light many of the issues facing them. Through this woman, my world really started opening up as I learned that men are more likely to die on the job, men are more likely to be homeless, men are being falsely accused of rape more frequently, and that not only does the "patriarchy" not hate women, but women are more likely to go to college and get a degree, women are exceeding men in education at every level, and that women fresh out of college don't make less than men, they make more. Christina has been a very open critic about modern feminism because of its demonization of men and masculinity (which she explores in her books "Who Stole Feminism?" and "The War on Boys"), as well its promotion of false wage gap statistics, rape statistics, and general dishonesty in saying that women are completely powerless in society, when in fact they are just as capable of success and power as men. She also helped me differentiate between 'equity' feminists like her and Camille Paglia, and 'gender' feminists like Gloria Steinem and Andrea Dworkin. This is when I really started to notice the extreme cognitive dissonance between what we think the world is like and what feminism means within it. CHS helped me become woke, but not as much as these next two women.

Karen Straughan (https://www.youtube.com/user/girlwriteswhat)
Karen is a men's rights activists and is part of a group known as the "Honey Badgers" (women who fight for men's rights). This woman is amazing, and she blew the top off society's actual treatment of men. Video highlights include "Feminism and the disposable male", "How feminism conned society", "Feminism, y'all gotta own this shit", "Feminist shaming tactics", "The tyranny of female hypoagency", and "Toxic Masculinity and TOXIC FEMININITY". She is a very eloquent speaker, and she presents her ideas in the most clear and honest way, that I really started to understand that men actually don't have it so good, that feminism exploits behaviors and attitudes we already have towards women (such as catering to their needs, their survival, and their identity), and that men value companionship, fatherhood, intellect, and loyalty far more than we give them credit for. Honestly, she is just awesome, not because she's an advocate for men, but because she points out that caring about men's issues and being a misogynist are not in any way related, and that men's rights activists are not a hate group meant to oppress women and/or pull focus away from women's issues. She simply wants men back in the cultural conversation towards gender.

Cassie Jaye (https://www.youtube.com/user/Cassiejaye)
This is the woman who cemented my interest in men's rights. She is the director of "The Red Pill", the controversial movie about the men's rights movement that feminists have been vehemently protesting since its release earlier this year. She fully explored why there needs to be a movement for men if they supposedly have every single advantage in life granted to them by the patriarchy. But what I saw wasn't a damning portrait of men, it was an eye-opening experience about how awful men can be treated in our society--and no one does a damn thing about it. She helped me see that if America really is an oppressive patriarchy completely catered to the needs of men: they're doing a shit job of showing it. Men are 43% of all domestic abuse victims, but there is only one shelter in the US that doesn't turn away male victims. Men are more likely to be homeless, men make up the majority of combat deaths, men are the majority of the drug addicted, and male rape is not a rare occurrence. Karen Straughan also makes a cameo in the film where she makes a solid point: if feminism isn't about hating men, then why is the source of everything evil known as the "patriarchy" (male connotations), whereas the saving grace of our society is "feminism" (female connotations)? Cassie Jaye was so moved by what she found out, that she stopped calling herself a feminist. And now knowing what I do, I see why.

Like I said, these women are just the major figures, but I HIGHLY encourage you to look-up these ladies as well: Erin Pizzey, Lauren Southern, Roaming Millennial, Julie Borowski, Peach Balie, Kisara Vera, Whitney Dahlin, Toxic Femininity, Barbara4u2c, ABitofBritt, RageAfterStorm, MyNameIsJosephine, and most definitely Camille Paglia.

I am very sad when I look back at how hateful I used to be towards my own gender. But I see that male struggles are valid and need to be addressed. I'm also sad that women have to be the ones fighting for our rights in order for anyone to take them somewhat seriously. Because, as it is very clearly shown in "The Red Pill", whenever men talk about men's issues they're accused of having "male fragility", "internalized misogyny", "toxic masculinity", and are "racist, sexist, anti-gay". I hope to help men who are suffering in any way I can, because knowing what I do now, I can no longer turn my back and pretend they don't exist.

5 Things You Can Do To Make Sure Trump Isn't Re-Elected

Now, assuming Trump isn't impeached before 2020 (everyone's doing their darndest to make this happen, but let's just assume he isn't for this exercise), here are five things you can do to make sure he doesn't retain the oval office in the next election:

1. Be Even More Condescending
Moral superiority is the best way to ensure equality, so whenever someone doesn't identify as a feminist, liberal, atheist, or social justice warrior, you need to get up on your pedestal and talk down to them like they're three-year old children. Educate them on how not subscribing to ideologies you identify with means they're a bad person and why they shouldn't think the way they do (but remember to throw in "this is for equality" so people won't think you're actually just being a douchebag to people you disagree with!)

2. Virtue-Signal Like You Never Have Before
Since there are so many racist, sexist, elitist, classist, misogynistic, homophobic, transphobic Nazi bigots out in America right now, it's important to show them what GOOD people think and do. Constantly talk about how good of a person you are, and how being a feminist/liberal/social justice warrior/atheist is really the only way to be a good person. Making people feel ashamed for what they believe in, how they talk, and how they move about the world is definitely going to make them steer away from voting Trump (because, as we all know, if you're not a feminist/liberal/social justice warrior/atheist, you're automatically a racist, sexist, elitist, classist, misogynistic, homophobic, transphobic Nazi bigot. There is absolutely NO in-between)

3. Make More Blanket Judgments
Now, since you took a four-month long feminist propaganda gender studies course, as well as a four-month long white guilt sociology course, you're clearly an encyclopedia for how everyone acts and thinks in American society. You need to call people out and hammer in the message that all white people are racist, all men are misogynistic, all cis-people are transphobic, all religious people hate atheists, and that all conservatives are racist, sexist, elitist, classist, misogynistic, homophobic, transphobic Nazi bigots. You know everything about a person based solely on their skin color and gender (some people might call that "racist" and "sexist", but as we've already discussed, your moral superiority means that you're justified and those who disagree with you just need to shut the fuck up). Equality is all about assumptions and telling people to "check their privilege". Which brings me to my next point

4. Tell People To "Check Their Privilege" Even More
It's obvious that only straight, white, cisgendered Christian males voted for Trump, because anyone who knows anything knows that his policies won't ever affect them. This is why you need to let men know that they're the most likely victim of every single violent crime they're more likely to commit suicide they're more likely to be homeless they're more likely to be incarcerated and receive harsher prison sentences 1 in 1 American women is raped every single day because the patriarchy enforces rape culture. You need to let white people know that Asian-Americans outperform every single race in terms of success, wealth, and education white men commit suicide more than any other racial demographic police brutality only affects people of color, due to the white supremacist Christian male patriarchy building the US to ensure white people (especially men) get an easy ride through life and that their needs are number one. Even if you don't personally know any of the people that you're telling to check their privilege, you already know every single thing about their lives based solely on their skin color and gender, so you can do no wrong.

5. Preach Equality and Diversity
Lastly, it's just so apparent that people didn't vote for Hillary because she was a liar corporate sellout greedy, negligent, identity-politics playing shill woman. This kind of misogyny is not acceptable in (insert current year here)! The US is just a hell-hole for human rights (yeah, third world countries are poorer, more war-torn, less accepting of diversity, and shorter on resources than we are, but that doesn't really fit the narrative so let's keep moving), so we need to make it our duty to make America a more inclusive and diverse society for all (and yes Affirmative Action laws, the Civil Rights Act, and the Equal Pay Act have all been in place since the 1960s, and hate crime statutes are all around the country to help make sure we're a diverse and accepting society but social justice doesn't care about logic and facts so shut up). Now, this doesn't mean we need diversity of thought, because as we've already covered, the only acceptable people are liberal, feminist, atheist, trans-gendered and LGBTQIA+. Everyone else is a racist, sexist, elitist, classist, misogynistic, homophobic, transphobic Nazi bigot and we must make sure to eradicate them from this country. Because that's what tolerance is, only surrounding yourself with people who identify with everything you do, and shaming, bullying, x-communicating, race-baiting, gender-baiting, and demonizing everyone else that has a different worldview.

If we take these steps, Trump will get his orange-colored ass booted from the white house in no time. Let's go my fellow whiny petulant children condescending, judgmental, snobby academic liberal  elitists fascists who are lack the cognitive ability to realize that they're more hateful than the people they're fighting against anti-fascists! The white, straight, Christian, cis-male oppressive patriarchy doesn't stand a chance against our wrath whining cry-bullying bigotry racism sexism battle cry for peace!